Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Black vs. African American??


Okay, okay, after watching the video, I’m sure one or two of you will think “Here we go again with this racial stuff” or “Why won’t black people let it go” or even “Why is this still a conversation?” The last question, I even ask myself sometimes when I see things on the news or just in conversations. It’s still a conversation, because it still needs to be. On one hand, it doesn’t bother me what people call me or how people refer to me. I’ve never been the type to give a rat’s ass about what people’s opinions are of me, but at the same time – no one likes being disrespected. I’ve heard several times, “It’s not how you refer to me that matters, but what I ANSWER to”. Let’s think about that for a second…

If you care how people view you, what you answer to can make or break you in the eyes of others. It’s all about how you view yourself and how important YOU are to YOU. Your view of you can only be changed by one person – YOU. I’ve been told by more than one person at more than one time in my life that I’m mean or too straight forward. Maybe "blunt" is a better word to use here. I may be blunt, but at least you know what is on my mind and there is no question about where I stand on any particular subject. I’d rather be “Straight Up” with you than considered a liar about anything. I digress…

So Tiki, what do you refer to yourself as? I’d answer that by giving one or more of these answers: a mother, a friend, a listener, a neighbor, a sister, a daughter, an inspiring writer… That list can go on and on. I am all of those things and more and I happen to be black also. Hardly anyone believes me when I say that I’m black anyway. It has always been that way and will continue to be. People always want to know what ELSE I’m mixed with… Then I go into the explanation that both my parents have the same skin tone as me… and so on and so on… In this day and age, is the explanation really necessary? Why not take me for what I say??

I’ve had several instances in my life where my skin tone was an issue. People either automatically hated me or they assumed that I thought I was better than them.. WTF? Because of my skin tone? C’mon people.. I know about the “Paper Sack Test” and the slave who was either in the house vs. outside… Are we still in that era?

I just don’t see things changing anytime soon. “Why can’t we just all be considered part of the human race?” Yes, why can’t we?

9 comments:

hollybeth75 said...

I agree with you Tiki. I think we should just all treat each other with respect. And when we start to disrespect each other and say insensitive things (on purpose) it just continues this finger pointing between races.
I don't like this girl in this video. She is talking like she is highly annoyed, she has a scowl on her face and it certainly doesn't make me want to hear what she has to say. It's like she's talking down to me (as the listener). I think that is the problem with people like her preaching this kind of statement. It's so easy to get irritated with the insensitive nature of the tone of the conversation and if she had just spoken with a little more sensitivity I think people would be more open minded to take a second look at their own behavior and see if there is something to check there. As it is, all I see is an angry annoying bitch I don't want to listen to.

Tanja said...

Once again, hollybeth, you start out by making a decent comment...but you always end up making a disrespectful, obscene, name-calling comment that deletes any previous thoughts you may have made. Just as the tone of the lady in the video offends you and you don't want to listen....ditto for your comments. When a debate/comment ends on a note of name-calling or insults it reduces the power of your words!

hollybeth75 said...

TANJA: Why do you care!?! FUCK! I'm entitled to my opinion and I don't believe for one second that it is reduced for anyreason any time just because you say it does. Just because you disagree with me doesn't mean I am wrong. Get over yourself and let me post my opinion in peace. Get off my ass.

Tanja said...

I don't believe that I mentioned whether or not I agree or disagree with your opinion. Just because someone tries to point out that words have meaning and power and that you should be mindful of that fact, it doesn't mean I automatically disagree with you. I think if you want to post your opinions in peace then you should not post them on the internet. That is what a diary is for. If you wish not to be challenged then perhaps this is the wrong forum for you. A little self-reflection is a good thing...not something to be threatened by. Have a great day.

Tiki said...

Ladies, ladies... C'mon now... I love both of you for the ideas, thoughts and opinions that you both have here on my blog regardless if I agree with either of you or not. I want my blog to be a place where anyone and everyone can feel free enough and that their opinions matter regardless if I/we agree or not. Most of the time, I don't agree with whatever I'm blogging about which is the reason why I'm blogging about it in the first place. If everyone agreed with everyone all the time, then what kind of boring world would we all live in?? We have to remember that we have to be able to "agree to disagree" for the art of blogging and be done with it...

hollybeth75 said...

You know what Tanja, you and your little cum ba ya philosophy is a total joke. Oh lets have the world be a better place where every one is treated fairly and justly right?! That's how you attempt to come off. Well I find it incredibly offensive that you continually pick on me on a personal level. If you had something so say about the points I was making that would be one thing. But you just pick on me to pick on me. You are a bully. You don't address the topic at all you just are mean to be mean. That's why I asked that you leave me the fuck alone. If you were capable of just commenting on the specific points I would welcome any responses. So why don't you self reflect on that mean girl.

Anonymous said...

Bottom line is that labels such as these allow the door to be opened about which race or heritage are you. And also promote uneducated talk. We should be happy that we are who we are. We should be willing to teach our kids about who they are and encourage them to grow and respect that meaning of what being african american is about. Black is not a true color or definition of who we are as a man,a woman or child. We can be whoever we wanna be. Lets not make a mockery of the two. Lets embrace and understand that we are all created equal. If you wanna be black, then be black, but be proudest black man or woman that you can be without being disrespectful to yourself or people just like you. If you wanna be african american, then be the best african american that you can be. Because in the end when God calls us home, he's not going to see color whether we're black or african american. He will only be seeing his children before him looking to have eternal glory and praise. So lets not label each other. Lets learn from one another. Thats whats wrong with us now. We label ourselves and then get mad at Tiger Woods for not wanting to be black. Hell Tiger doesn't label who he is . He embraces who he is. And we should as well.

Peace

Tanja said...

I debated for a long time whether or not to respond to your last post Hollybeth and I wasn't going to....but I must. You accused me of not addressing the point of the post. I guess I didn't make myself clear enough so I will make my original point again and more clear. You started your post by saying that "...we should all treat each other with respect" and "..."to disrespect...and say insensitive things...continues fingerpointing...". You accused the girl in the video of having an "insensitive tone" and instructed her that if she had just "spoken with a little more sensitivity" that "people would be more open-minded". You then concluded your post by calling this girl, whom you don't know, an "angry, annoying bitch". My point was that your comment was hypocritical. You expect the BLACK girl to speak sensitive with less tone, yet you are supposed to be able to say any insensitive thing you like. I never attacked you personally, I was simply pointing out your fallacy. You, however, attacked me in each blog. If you are going to make a standard of behavior for people make sure that you live up to the same standard. That was the point I was originally making. I hope I made it clear.

Jennifer said...

(before I begin, i didn't watch the video)
i completely believe that people are people and everyone deserves to be respected and treated fairly because we are human beings. however, i think it's important to recognize the things that make us diverse. i don't like when people say they are color blind. i'm not saying people should be treated differently because of their color, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender, etc. but we should honor and cherish our differences and celebrate them. so when someone says they don't see color and they see people i don't think that's positive. being black, myself, i totally think it's fine for someone to be like "damn it sucked what happened to y'all back then but everything (for the most part) is cool now." i don't want anything special because i'm black. i don't agree with affirmative action. and i have to try to to tell myself i have gotten where i am today and where i'm headed because i'm intelligent and awesome.

when i list the things that make up who i am woman is first, lesbian second, black is third. i place lesbian second because that is something that is not visible and it's important for me that people know that. to me it's not something that should be hidden. if people are not out nothing will ever change in this country. i could keep going on my gay soapbox so i'll step off now. :)